Divorce is difficult. I am not trying to minimize that undeniable fact, but I do want you to know that there are benefits to enduring a marital dissolution as well. Divorce is not in its entirety a cause for celebration, even though I did have a divorce party, and I am super happily divorced. It’s the end of a marriage, and no matter how bad the marriage was, the fact that it’s over is sad. The dreams you and your spouse had for your life together are over.
But there are so many benefits. Here’s my list!
- I used to be lonely; I’m not anymore.
- My happiness and mood used to be entirely dependent on my ex.
- My friendships have become much stronger.
- I was able to take the time and space to work on myself.
- My ex and I have become friends, a real support system for each other and our kids.
- I feel better about myself. My self-esteem and self-worth have improved dramatically.
- My future is so bright, with so much to look forward to.
- My relationship with the kids has solidified and flourished
- I found true love.
- I no longer feel trapped.
- I don’t feel judged all the time.
- I get to make all my own decisions and do it my way. Scary but good.
- I don’t wait up for my ex to get home from work or have to keep his dinner warm.
- I do not need to keep the house clean to his OCD rules.
- I do not need his constant approval.
- I do not need to dull myself, my clothes, or my personality down to fit his ideal.
- I can have my own opinions.
- I don’t have to make excuses for him, his behavior, or his lack of being present at events.
- No more walking on eggshells.
- I can now let go of the love that wasn’t there
- One of the best parts for me is the built-in breaks. I have weekends. and weeks where I am not an active, full time mommy. It’s amazing.
Yes, divorce is awful for everyone involved, but if done for the right reasons, it can also be a beautiful beginning. Life is too short to be unhappy. The real best part of being divorced is that I found myself, the Suburban Goddess Mom.